most friday fun

I took mom to her pre-chemo blood draw and meeting with Dr. C, back from her own 2-week leave and seeing mom for the first time in a month. Sis C and The Nephew were there for the meeting. [Side note: I told The Nephew that Sister A was going to shave her hair off in solidarity with mom's hair loss and that he should do so too. He agreed, so there may be a few cueballs at the next family gathering]

All clear for Chemo - Round 2. The judges scored Round 1 in mom's favor. After 3 weeks, her blood pressure is normal, white blood cell count as expected, less pain, weight holding. Take that, cheneys!

Dr. C seems to be a bit unsettled because mom said she observed a slight defensiveness that was not present in the earlier meeting/telephone conversations. C'mon, I barely asked any questions.

After assuring us that she consulted with more colleagues than would normally have been the case, she gave us a strange lecture about the "danger" of getting another opinion at this point because it could be completely different and we could not stop the current protocol mid-process.

I gave her a look and said more information is always better and that, given the information we had at the time, we were comfortable with the current treatment. There were a few things I didn't say, but I'm sure my expression was at least an additional paragraph, if not a short story.

For us, the priority is mom's confidence in the professionals in charge of her case. As long as she's happy with Dr. C, we're fine too. However, we're not going to worship at her altar.

It's a bit of a balancing act between making sure the ill person has advocacy in navigating the medical system and managing the relationships with the health care professionals you need throughout the process.

Dr. C has clearly made some assumptions about mom that are laughably wrong. For instance, based on the comments she chose to make today, we think she believes mom needs lots of people contact for support and reinforcement.

This conclusion was probably drawn from the fact that most of us participated in the initial meeting (my tinny persistent voice coming out of the phone right next to her keyboard) and my ongoing attempts to get either a 2nd opinion or a consult with another oncologist within the TKO system outside of Hawai'i.

Fortunately for us, the "real" mom is present and fully engaged in taking care of mind, body and spirit...as she always has been. I am happy to be able to spend time with her and the family and lend my back to whatever lifting needs to be done. Mom has always been the moral and emotional center around which our family revolves. I'm honored to be able to support her for a change.

If Dr. C only knew.