San Francisco Giants - 2010 World Series Champions

Go Giants! Mom, you would have loved this team of goof balls.

I have to post after following the San Francisco Giants through the play off season and on to last night's Game 5 win over the Texas Rangers to win the World Series for the first time since moving the franchise to San Francisco in the late 50s.

Why? Because mom was a baseball nut of the first order and her favorite team of all time was the San Francisco Giants. The last time she visited me in the Bay Area, she insisted I buy the cheapest outfield seats because she wanted to walk around (then) Pac-Bell Park and preferred the outfield bleachers. It was a perfect baseball day. I took off work early and we walked along the Embarcadero to the ballpark and watched her beloved Barry Bonds almost hit a homer into McCovey Cove.

The pleasure I got from watching these late season games nearly off-set the pain of missing mom and her droll insights this past year in sports. She would have been so thrilled for this team that came together and peaked at the right time, and their selfless and inspired pitching, defense and hitting.

The fantastic Giants win made me remember a couple of happy times for her when she was sick at the end of 2008 and into 2009.

There weren't many highlights during that time for us, but a couple of sports-related things did energize and excite her and helped us enjoy our time together.

The 1st bit of fun was a surprise visit in December by Misty May-Treanor and her husband Matt, yes, that Matt Treanor, currently playing with the Texas Rangers. My Uncle G is a long-time friend of Misty's dad. He and my aunt went to Beijing at Misty's invitation and watched her and Kerry Walsh win Gold in Beach Volleyball.

Uncle G decided to take the Treanors on a little detour to the windward side when they visited Hawai'i in 2008. Mom and my sister got their picture taken with a 2-time Gold Medal Olympian *but* all mom talked about later was how excited she was to talk with Matt Treanor about pro baseball and what his plans were (I think he had just been released by the Florida Marlins and was uncertain about his future). According to mom and my sister, Matt Treanor was a friendly, down-to-earth accessible guy. I think Misty was more of an enigma.

Matt Treanor bounced around teams quite a bit between that sickroom visit he made to my very ill mother who was "only" a friend-of-a-friend. He was traded to the Rangers in March this year, and now he's playing for the 1st time in a World Series against my mom's favorite-of-all-time baseball team, the San Francisco Giants.

My mom, being a true fan, would be cheering on her Giants, but she would be just as happy for Matt Treanor to win a Championship after slogging it out under the radar for so many years.

It's a win-win for me as I'll always be appreciative of how much my sports nut mother enjoyed Matt and Misty's visit 2 years ago.

The 2nd bit of fun with mom is tennis-related. She and I got up at weird hours and watched the 2009 Australian Open. While she appreciated (former No. 1) Roger Federer's tennis, she *loved* watching current No. 1, Rafael Nadal. Yes, she was an unorthodox, self-taught lefty who beat a bunch of club players for a local championship that her peers still talk about decades later. We had so much fun watching him win that tournament and that time period was the best she would feel, physically, throughout her chemo treatments.

This is what I posted on the blog on Monday, February 2, 2009:

tennis, anyone?

Mom and I stayed up into the wee hours Sunday to watch the Australian Open men's final. Mom's version of watching was to sit in her fold-out sports chair, bent over with her eyes closed. I would periodically rouse her and tell her to watch a replay of an amazing exchange or ask her if she wanted to get onto the bed and she would say, "No, because then I'll really go to sleep."

By the 5th set we were both wide awake to watch Rafa Nadal win his 1st hard court major. That last set was a lesson in focus of intent to the exclusion of physical discomfort, environment, and the other guy across the net, who may just be one of the greatest tennis players of all time. My take-away was that a great competitor beat a great artist and comparisons don't apply, but sports fans reap the benefit of one of the great rivalries of the current generation. Wow.

Long-time friends and family know which player mom most closely resembles. Hint: not the artist.

Mom, your Giants finally brought home a Championship trophy to San Francisco and they did it the old school way - brilliant pitching, solid defense and no egos.

April 1, 2010 - all things mom

If you’re reading this post, you, like me have been thinking about Pee, aka Pee Wee, aka Elaine, aka Popo, aka Mom.

It’s a shame that a milestone like death is the magnet that attracts memory. While I’m at peace with the fact that we gave mom a good death, it’s really memories of her life that simultaneously make me laugh and ache. The good thing about these twin feelings is that I then recall all the times with mom that I laughed until I ached.

She was too low-key to be a comedian, but dang, the woman was funny.

I’ve many an email from her just updating me on everyday stuff, or taunting us with the results of our Pigskin Picks and exhorting us to do better so she could collect a free trip to Las Vegas and, no matter how mundane, there was always a memorable line or two that made me laugh.

Her clear-eyed and astringent observations about family members, athletes, political figures and locals-in-the-news were original and offered me insight from a mind-set that was completely alien to me. As well as I knew her, she remained a delightful and sometimes frustratingly stubborn puzzle. I have all the pieces, but the picture remains opaque.

To me, she was (sometimes) painfully direct in her communications. Yet, I know that she wasn’t so honest with others. I’ve come to realize that there was a pattern to her uncharacteristically circuitous language; she would stop short of breaking someone. She would lie by omission if she thought what she had to say about a person’s character would break their spirit.

In retrospect, this fundamental difference between us was the arena in which all of our disagreements played out. Yes, I often thought that she wasn’t direct enough in relationships that she was deeply invested in. Writing those words makes me laugh, because she did not spare me. She wielded a sharp observational and opinionated knife and I felt many a cut-to-the-bone comment. For the curious, these remarks were not coded comments about my lifestyle. Mom was not superficial and she did not believe that other peoples’ behavior was any reflection on her. She did think about old-timey things such as family obligations, but she did not bow to convention.

No, mom’s judgment was reserved for what she perceived as wrong-headed actions that might be indicative of a character flaw that should be worked on or corrected. If you have not had the privilege of being flayed open by her, you have not been forced to look deeply at your ethics and how you move and act in the world and in your close relationships. Opening yourself to her unedited opinion was not for the faint-hearted. If she offered any advice, you would be wise to give it long and serious consideration. She was often right.

Her moral compass was honesty and justice for all. And she really meant *all*. Many of our most intense discussions were about the ethical failures and criminality of elected officials and business leaders. She reserved her harshest judgment for people in power and religious hypocrites.

She did not suffer fools and she was sensitive to and very concerned by the dumbing-down of debate in American and Hawaiian society. We often discussed the implications of the rise of religious fundamentalism and what that meant and reflected about our modern American/Hawaiian culture.

Other than our mutual taste for weird food combinations, mom and I shared curiosity and a sincere interest in learning about what made people tick - the basis for some of the most interesting and thought-provoking conversations that I’ve ever shared with another human being.

I both miss and am grateful for her; courage, wryness, wisdom, clarity of perception, love of reading, competitiveness, sports fanaticism, Las Vegas adventuring, very rare occasions wearing a Mom Hat, interest in people and places, stubbornness, goofy get rich quick schemes, complete lack of sentimentality, strength, cheap stocking stuffers, critical thinking, perfect fried chicken, no-nonsense compassion and advocacy for the disenfranchised, spirituality, connection to nature, cat crazies and all the myriad of qualities, conditions, triumphs and failures that leave such a deep hole in the lives of those of us who were fortunate enough to come under the attention of her gimlet eye and generous spirit.

As a good friend of mine put it, “You’ve suffered a deep wound, but it’s a clean one. You will heal.”